The holidays are just around the corner, and while many families are excited about big meals and holiday treats, this time of year can feel stressful for parents of children with feeding challenges. Whether your child is picky, avoids certain textures, or has difficulty chewing or swallowing, feeding challenges can overwhelm family gatherings.
But there’s good news! With the right preparation, you can help your child feel more comfortable with food, and even enjoy meals during the holiday season. We are publishing a three-part series to help you help your child overcome feeding challenges in time for and throughout the holidays. This is the first installment in the series, laying the foundation for what is to come! It is important to help your child prepare emotionally and mentally for the process.
Here’s how to get your child ready for and help them build the language to self-advocate and regulate their emotions during the process.
- Should You Start Feeding Therapy?
First, it’s important to know if feeding therapy is the right next step for your child. Some signs that your child might benefit include:
- Refusing to eat certain textures or types of food (like fruits, vegetables, or anything “mushy”)
- Gagging or throwing up when trying new foods
- Taking a long time to chew or swallow
- Difficulty gaining weight or staying on track with growth
- Meals turning into a daily struggle and/or causing stress for the whole family
If you notice these behaviors, it may be time to talk to a therapist who specializes in feeding challenges. Feeding therapy isn’t just about getting your child to eat more—it’s about helping them feel safe and confident with food, which can make a huge difference, especially around holiday meals.
- Give Your Child Language to Speak Up
Teaching your child how to express their feelings about food is one of the most important steps in this process. Children with feeding challenges often feel frustrated or anxious because they don’t know how to communicate what’s bothering them. Here’s how you can help:
- Label Their Feelings: Start by helping your child recognize and label their feelings around food. Phrases like, “I feel scared to eat this,” or “This food makes me feel yucky,” can help them express their discomfort. You can also teach them to say, “This is hard for me, but I want to try,” which encourages them to be brave but honest about their limits.
- Teach “No, Thank You”: It’s important that your child learns how to say no politely. Teach them phrases like, “No, thank you, I don’t like this texture,” or “Can I have a smaller piece to try?” This empowers your child to say no in a way that feels respectful and keeps the conversation open.
- Create a “Safe Word”: For times when your child feels overwhelmed, a special word like “pause” or “break” can give them a quick way to signal that they need a moment without feeling pressured to explain. This helps them take control of the situation and feel safer around food.
3. Equip Your Child with Tools to Regulate
Emotions can run high while tackling feeding challenges, and mealtimes in general. It’s helpful to give your child strategies to calm down and reset when they feel anxious or upset about food.
- Deep Breathing: Teach your child simple deep breathing exercises to help calm their nerves before meals. For example, you can practice “smelling the flowers and blowing out the candles” (inhale through the nose like you’re smelling flowers, then exhale through the mouth like you’re blowing out candles). Deep breathing helps relax the body and mind, making it easier to try new foods.
- Body Breaks: Sometimes, kids need a little physical activity to burn off stress or reset their sensory system. Allow your child to take short “body breaks” before or during meals to stretch, jump, or do another calming activity. These breaks can help them feel more in control and ready to return to the table.
- Fidget Tools: A small, calming object like a squishy ball or soft fabric can give your child something to hold onto during mealtimes. Fidget tools can help your child stay grounded and focused when they feel nervous about trying new foods.
Build Up Gradually
Remember, this is a process and it’s important to go at your child’s pace. Don’t expect instant results, and be patient as your child works through their challenges. Each small step, like touching a new food or taking a tiny bite, is a victory worth celebrating.
As the holidays approach, start slowly introducing some of the foods that may be served during holiday meals. This can help your child become more familiar with those foods before the big day. Use the language and tools mentioned above to support them along the way.
Final Thoughts
Preparing your child is one of the best gifts you can give them this holiday season. Not only will it make family meals more enjoyable, but it will also give your child important skills for the future. We are going to be posting two more blogs over the next couple of weeks with next steps, so make sure you are on the lookout for the notification when they go live! Together and with the right support, your child can build a healthier relationship with food—and maybe even try a new holiday dish this year!
Be sure to check out Part Two (out now!) and Part Three of our feeding series for more dining table tips!